The Final Day

Tomorrow is the first of December. Obvious, yes, but also insane.

Day 29

Being home has been nice and all. But it doesn't feel like being home, ya know? Well, actually, you probably don't know. Maybe you do. But I've hardly elaborated on that thought at all. So how could you really know what I mean? So, yeah, you probably don't.

In 24 hours I'll be on my way to the airport. Which will mean at least 2 weeks of not fighting about who gets to use the car.

Black Friday

Today I:

• Dyed my hair very, very red. I mean, red. I am bordering on Italian woman from Brooklyn red. Which means purple.
• Had lunch with an old boyfriend.
• Am going to the Walker Art Museum with my great step-grandmother.
• Am going to see Kimya Dawson.
  

Giving Thanks

Happy Thanksgiving! This holiday has changed a lot since I was a kid. Not literally changed, all of the traditions are the same - you eat turkey, you see family, you maybe talk about what you're thankful for that year. Whatever. But what I do on Thanksgiving has changed.

As I was growing up we celebrated with a small dinner at my parent's house. My dad would cook the turkey, my mom would do the mashed potatoes and the gravy and the stuffing and the green beans. My dad's parents and his brother would come over. It was very small, but nice.

Nowadays, which really translates to "after the divorce", I go to two celebrations. One is big and involves a family football game. The other is small and involves a restaurant. I'm getting used to it.

Normal

We are all still quite capable of fighting with each other.

End of the Tunnel

I've made it. All I have to do now is pack. And get to the airport.

Mocha Club

I was asked by Mocha Club to blog about why I need Africa more than Africa needs me. Mocha Club is a is a community-based website where members can start a team and invite friends to join them in giving $7 a month – the cost of 2 mochas – to support a project in Africa. Mocha Club's vision is to provide a way for people who don't have hundreds or thousands of dollars to make a difference in Africa.

I've only been to Africa once. It was the trip of a lifetime. I spent two weeks in South Africa, visiting both Cape Town and Johannesburg. Some people have told me that what I saw wasn't "real Africa", but I don't think that's necessarily true. Spending time in the township of Guguletu (I also briefly visited Soweto, but spent most of the trip in or around Gugs) certainly seemed real enough as I encountered HIV/AIDS, hunger, and poverty firsthand.

Realism

Things I would like to do today:

• Get a pedicure
• Take a long nap
• Read "Rough Magic: A Biography of Sylvia Plath"
• Go out to eat

Things I will actually do today:

• Write a paper about the importance of family in Exodus
• Update my other blog with a nice long post on what I learned at my unpaid internship
• Research and write a lab report on the importance of wording in questionnaires
• Maybe some laundry

Greetings From Philadelphia

Contrary to what some TV show titles might suggest it is not always sunny in Philadelphia. It's 30 degrees here right now, which is actually quite cold.

Heading Out

It seems like I haven't slept since Wednesday morning. That may well be true, actually, but it seems of little importance now that I can finally see my way through to Tuesday night, home, and Thanksgiving. I have taken on a striking resemblance to a cancer patient in the past few days. So, I think I'll take a shower and go to Philadelphia.

The Experience of Poetry

Do you want to write a 5 page paper on "Theme for English B" by Langston Hughes? Okay.

Make a claim about the speaker and the act of writing. How does the speaker "talk" to Harlem, to himself, and to his white instructor? How is Hughes's poem shaped by the speaker's...

Aack.

I had a psychic dream!

Today was the last day of my internship. I garnished it with a spreadsheet made in Microsoft Visio.

Reverse Haiku

Feels like Wednesday
Am one day ahead
But feel so, so far behind

Tastes like 7th Grade

"We brew Samuel Adams OctoberFest to celebrate the arrival of autumn. This hearty lager is rich with a blend of five malts, carefully balanced with hand-selected Noble hops. Samuel Adams OctoberFest is a classical beer style brewed in the finest American tradition. Cheers!"

They aren't lying.

Not Depressed

I guess I will choose laundry, sorting and folding clothes, changing sheets, and organizing the closet over a life of squalor. Somebody needs to hide the beer before tomorrow.

Dick Move

Waiting until I fall asleep to put your clothes on and leave.

Incapacitated

I am waking up in just a few hours to catch a train to Baltimore. I will then journey to Raven's Stadium to see Notre Dame play Navy. Let us keep our fingers crossed.

Friday Afternoon Nap

The important things are done. I bought train tickets and have game tickets for ND vs. Navy tomorrow. Lots of stuff coming up, but right now, a nap.

Business as Usual

"Don't guys dream about waking up to a semi-naked woman crawling all over them?"
"No. Guys dream about waking up to a blow job."
"Hmmph. Well, I dream about coming home to a nice breakfast that you've made me and a warm, fluffy blanket."
At this point he has started to rearrange the bedding and I think that maybe it's only a matter of time until my dream comes true.
*Wonk*
My head is hit against the headboard as he tries to wrangle me into a semblance of sleep.
"Oh, I get it. You're trying to give me a concussion. 'This'll taste so good, you won't even want tea.' Thanks."

Day 6 Nubbin

George Bush is going to spend the last 68 days of his presidency spying on me. No, really, he is. Rachel Maddow told me. Let me further evidence this story by telling you that when I got to work this morning ther were emails waiting on my computer. From the future.

CVS

The CVS Pharmacy slogan is "pharmacists who care." More like "pharmacists who totally didn't pay attention in school" or "pharmacists who can't work a computer worth a damn."

Traffic Circles

Today I drove in DC for the first time. And no one died. This should not be a milestone, but it is.

Question

Is it wrong to keep a tally of friends who forgot my birthday? And then to divide that tally into important friends and non-important friends? Probably.

Anyway. Yesterday was a day for brunch, the mall (blech), and Ethiopian food. Today is a day for breaking in new pairs of shoes and wandering around Georgetown. And maybe getting a manicure? I don't know.

Getting older and not much better

The only famous person who shares my birthday is Tara Reid. Okay, she's not the only famous person. There's also Milton Bradley, Bram Stoker, and Parker Posey. And the guy who discovered Halley's comet. But really. Slim pickings.

Um, I just got an Edible Arrangements delivery.

Diary Excerpt

11/07/2008

Birthday tomorrow. Let's not talk about it. [Mindless details about past birthdays]. Mom is coming in at some point this afternoon - I realize a time will come (perhaps sooner than I think) when it won't be possible for her to come and attempt to rescue me. [Mindless details about gifts I hope to receive]. I have spent all of Poetry class writing on my thigh to cheat on my Abnormal Psych test. I still hate Robert Frost. I had a dream last night that I couldn't drive anymore. I also had a dream that told me to pluck my eyebrows. So I did.

***

Okay, McDonalds, I know that we've been indulging in each other quite often as of late. Me in your McNuggets, you in my debit card. But let us not pretend that any of your food options are a "meal". (A cunt girl told me I was pathetic for writing test answers on my thing. Cunt. Running is not a sport. Cunt.)*

* This happened as I was walking out of "The Experience of Poetry". She really felt the need to stop me and say "Sorry, but I think it's pathetic that you were writing answers on your thigh." I mention the part about running not being a sport because she is one of those people who wears running shoes at all times.

Note: I did not use any of my thigh-cheats in the end. Mostly because I was stunned/stung by running shoes's remark, but also because I had already done a pretty kickass job of memorizing the stuff I needed to know. Take this acronym for the 5 layers of erotic life, for example. The five layers are:
1. Gender Identity
2. Sexual Orientation
3. Sexual Preference
4. Sex Role
5. Sexual Performance
I remembered this as GOPRP (Grand Old Party, Republican Party). It's good, right? I thought so.

I reckon you're about an 8 or a 9

I just put the finishing touches on a paper titled "It’s a Jungle Out There: Maximization Strategy vs. Equalization Strategy in Mate Selection". I seem to get a lot more out of this title than the other people I've shared it with. Hmm.

I just want to read "The Bell Jar"

Buried in a pile of informed consent forms, debriefing forms, lab reports, study guides, Emily Dickinson, Walt Whitman, and a book on language death. And assholes. Did I mention assholes?

I am happy, though. Really. I'm happy. I'm in DC. I'm where it's all happening. I didn't quite have it in me to run over to the White House after they called Barack's victory, but I did run around the quad cheering. And I drank a celebratory glass of sparkling kosher grape juice during the acceptance speech.

Waiting for 270

Me, voting for the first time

Despite having an absolutely shit day, I'm thrilled by the election returns. "It's looking, shall we say, exceedingly grim for John McCain right now," says Wolf Blitzer. Music to my ears, Wolf. Music to my ears. I have the kosher sparkling grape juice chilling in the mini-fridge. Here's hoping the only thing they make me do at work tomorrow is celebrate!

Sexlection

My roommate and I have been bouncing around various questions on the theme of "How long do you think it has been since Barack and Michelle have had sex?"

Instead of boring you with my election anxiety, I offer you two links on this theme:

The Playboy Presidential Sex Quiz and Babeland's genius voting incentive.

Unfortunately I won't be in Babeland proximity for this one, but Starbucks, Krispy Kreme, and Ben & Jerry's are also doing election day freebies.

I wonder...

I'm glad to see that Fannie Mae is sponsoring a Help the Homeless Walkathon. But really, at this point, shouldn't Fannie be trying to help herself?

Day 1: In which I rehash, and use bullet points

So, NaBloPoMo. It's here, and I'm going for it. I'm kind of appalled that it's November already. November is the month of my birthday (a week from today, in fact) and also the month of Thanksgiving. Both of these things used to excited me. Now they just make me uneasy.

One precedent to November 1st is, of course, Halloween. So, let's talk about that. Mine consisted of:

• a sobbing phone call to my mother
• a cobbled together aviator costume
• an impromptu meetup with several people I haven't seen in about 5 months
• wandering aimlessly around Georgetown
  
• drinking boxed wine out of a MinuteMaid apple juice bottle
• shouting at passersby that our tin-foil wrapped group member was, in fact, the Tin-Man and not a Chipotle burrito
• putting my new Nikon Coolpix to good use
• ending the night at a party I DID NOT mean to go to
• having an excellent time at a party I DID NOT mean to go to
  
• crappy beer (Keystone Light)

So far, today has consisted of:

• angry text messages from my ex-boyfriend
• a headache